Creative Hockey: on the Ice, in the Field and in Quotations

The Lighter Side of Hockey

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The Lighter Side of Hockey

A puck is a hard rubber disc that hockey players strike when they can't hit one another. 
--Jimmy Cannon

American professional athletes are bilingual; they speak English and profanity
--Gordie Howe

Bridge is the only game that bruises more shins than hockey.
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By the age of 18, the average American has witnessed 200,000 acts of violence on television, most of them occurring during Game 1 of the NHL playoff series. 
--Steve Rushin

Canada is a country whose main exports are hockey players and cold fronts. Our main imports are baseball players and acid rain.
--Pierre Trudeau

Hockey would be a great game... if played in the mud.
--Jimmy Cannon

How would you like a job where, if you made a mistake, a big red light goes on and 18,000 people boo?
--Jacques Plante

Ice hockey is a form of disorderly conduct in which the score is kept. 
--Doug Larson

No, I never broke my nose playing ice hockey; but eleven other guys did.
--Gordie Howe

Playing goal is like being shot at.
--Jacques Plante

Some guys play hockey. Gretzky plays 40mph chess.
--Lowell Cohn

The only way you can check Gretzky is to hit him when he is standing still singing the national anthem.
--Harry Sinden

There was a hockey player who failed as a chef specializing in birthday cakes. He was always called for icing.
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They say atomic radiation can hurt your reproductive organs. My answer is, so can a hockey stick. But we don't stop building them.
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They were checking us so closely, I could tell what brand of deodorant they were using.
--Flyer Gary Dornhoefer

We get nose jobs all the time in the NHL, and we don't even have to go to the hospital. 
--Brad Park


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